You know you're addicted to MasterChef when....

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

  1. You steal one of those luminous orange, plastic traffic cones from a roadworks site, so that you can practice making croquembouche.
  2. As fishermen get distracted, you gobble some of their bait.
  3. You awaken sweaty shouting "I can't be responsible for taking away someone elses dreams"
  4. You sell the Commodore and buy a red scooter......because...well just because
  5. Your colleague returns to the office after a lunch break and you greet them by running and leaping onto then and wrap your legs around them squealing.
  6. You've taken to wearing colourful cravats when you eat, and you find that you carefully roll each mouthful around in your mouth (and roll your eyes along with it)
  7. It's knock off time and you burst into tears saying "It's not my time to go"
  8. When it’s your husbands turn to cook, you sit in the kitchen and take notes
  9. You now are compelled to do every vegetable three different ways on the one dish.
  10. You prepare 3 meals every night...cover them in black cloths........sit the family down on bar stools and make them guess which one is tonight’s dinner
  11. You install a surveillance camera to keep an eye on the beef!
  12. The supermarket bans you for trying to shop in 2 minutes.
  13. You have a crazed urge to stand on a ladder above whoever is cooking in the kitchen and yell down encouragement and helpful suggestions.
  14. The kids want fish and chips for tea, so you ring around boat hire companies
  15. When the kids hold up score cards on the dinner you have just made
  16. You have painstakingly trimmed all the hedges in your garden into the shape of the MasterChef logo
  17. Your girlfriend says she wants to play 'hide the beef' & the 1st thing you think of is Tom
  18. When you cut one of your trees down do bring in the trunk base to serve your cupcakes that you have just sat on
  19. When you place an order at a restaurant and you find yourself yelling out to the chefs - "Cook as if your life depends on it - Yeah!!!"Make me proud - Yeah!!!"
  20. You can't talk about food without throwing the word 'caramellisation' in there somewhere.
  21. You refer to any sort of burning, browning, as "caramelising"
  22. You tell your boyfriend you'll meet him in the Pantry and he'd better Make It Happen.
  23. You rearrange your pantry ever week then cant find what you need as it is in a new spot.
  24. You wrap a bandaid around every finger, just so you have 'the look'.
  25. Before MasterChef, you had no idea what a silk cravat was.
  26. You start rocking back & forth on your feet when you talk to people and go higher when you want to make a point
  27. You finally know what 'reduction' means and keep using it in every sentence, even when it doesn't make sense such as…..Oh that coffee would be with be nice with milk reduction
  28. You are going to have baked beans and you think 'how can i take this to another level'
  29. You make cupcakes for the local school fete......and crumble them all into a pile


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